Lisa Ray is impossible to pigeonhole. Internationally acclaimed actress, model, philanthropist, designer, writer, TV host and social activist – the green-eyed beauty wears all these hats and more. Diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma in 2009, Ray fought back and remains a tireless advocate for cancer survivors worldwide.
Actress. Survivor. Advocate.
There’s so much more to Lisa Ray than meets the eye. Rocketing to fame in India in the 90s, she became an iconic figure and was named one of the ‘Ten Most Beautiful Indian Women of the Millennium’ by a Times of India Poll. Through critically acclaimed movies like Water, which was nominated for an Academy Award, Ray carved a name for herself as a successful actress and was seen in numerous productions in Canada and the U.S. She is also known for her triumphant battle against Multiple Myeloma, the incurable blood cancer she was diagnosed with in 2009 and her journey is an inspiring tale of resilience and determination. “My life has been about accumulating adventures, travel and experiences,” Ray says. “Whatever I accomplish during this mission is fantastic but I don’t judge my progress through life the way society does.”
A Cross-Cultural Childhood
“I relished my mixed background,” says Ray. “It gave me a wider lens from which to encounter the world.” Born in Toronto to a Bengali father and Polish mother, Ray spent her childhood years alternating between Toronto and Calcutta and embraced both her cultural backgrounds. “I was fully immersed in both my Polish and Indian traditions, from going to church and snacking kielbasa and bread in Roncesvalles to celebrating Durga Puja and playing with cousins by the side of the Ganga in Serampore, outside Calcutta.”
In late 70s and early 80s when Ray was growing up, she recalls there weren’t many other kids with mixed ethnicity, and her self-identification as an Indo-Pole was confusing for many people to understand. However, Ray grew comfortable with her dichotomous heritage and believes it is her diversity which makes it easy for her to adapt to new places. “I’m a born nomad,” she says. “I have lived in London, Paris, Milan, New York, LA and Toronto and while I never feel like a foreigner, I am always the outsider.”
Growing up, Ray was also extremely rebellious, and transferred out of three different high schools as a teenager, despite her academic excellence. She received an award for the highest grades in History and English in the province of Ontario, but admits she was unchallenged and often bored at school. “I was a rebel at heart and felt there was much more to experience outside of the system. I never looked for validation from society even as a teenager,” she states. “I was a strange, socially maladaptive kid: very sensitive, artistic, studious, highly rebellious and fanatically independent.”
Accidental Actress
Ray’s streak of independence played a major part in deciding which projects she chose to work in. After an accidental discovery by a modelling agent while holidaying in India as a teenager, Ray became an overnight sensation when her first advertisement for Bombay Dyeing released and she quickly rose through the ranks with iconic ads like Garden Saris and Lakme. When movie offers came pouring in, Ray chose carefully, finally making her Bollywood debut in 2001 with Vikram Bhatt’s thriller Kasoor. Her first film in English was Deepa Mehta’s cross-over romantic comedy, Bollywood Hollywood. It premiered at the 2002 Toronto Film Festival, where she was voted as the ‘Star of the Future’ for her role.
“I was fortunate to have an accidental but very successful beginning to my career in Bombay, during a very special time in the history of the city,” Ray reflects on her early career and ‘accidental actress’ is one of the phrases she uses to describe herself on her website. She goes on to add, “I have seen the industry from the outside in and yet resisted many lucrative offers from mainstream Bollywood due to my independent nature. I’ll never make a list of whom I’ve said ‘no’ to... but it’s pretty impressive!”
After realizing her passion for acting, Ray moved to London in order to pursue a serious career in the performing arts. She studied at the Central School of Speech and Drama, the London Centre for Theatre Studies, The Desmond Jones school of Physical Theatre and graduated from the Academy of Live and Recorded Arts in 2004, with a post-graduate degree in acting. While studying, Ray made an effort to not accept any work until she had graduated. However, she was unable to refuse Deepa Mehta’s offer to play the lead in the highly controversial film of its time, Water, which was nominated for an Oscar in 2007. Set in a pre-independent India, the internationally acclaimed examines the lives of a group of widows who are exiled to a temple in the holy city of Varanasi.
Since her role as the Hindu widow, Kalyani, Ray has played numerous other marginalized and unconventional characters. Some of her most notable appearances include a wife coming out as gay in 1950s South Africa in The World Unseen (2007) and a single woman running a farm in All Hat (2007). She is unable to decide which project moved her most.“Water is a highlight, but each project has enriched me,” says Ray. “From Kasoor to Bollywood/Hollywood to The World Unseen to my appearances in mainstream TV shows and documentaries… it’s all part of the play and drama of life.”
Battle with Cancer
It was during a month-long Moksha yoga teacher training course in Kerala, India, where Ray first began to feel unwell and in June 2009, the then 37-year-old was diagnosed with Multiple myeloma, an incurable cancer of the plasma cells. This relatively rare type of cancer affects multiple areas of the bone marrow and can also prevent major organs from functioning normally. According to the Myeloma Canada, the average diagnosis is 60 years of age, with only 4% of cases diagnosed in people under 45 and Ray believes her young age had a lot to do with beating the cancer.
Her treatment included four months of steroids and rounds of chemotherapy before culminating in a stem cell transplant on Christmas 2009, at Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto.Throughout her battle with the aggressive cancer, Ray managed to stay positive, which she attributes to the unwavering support she received from her father, friends and community as well as her own spirituality. “I have spent a good proportion of the last decade of my life working on myself and my inner life whether it meant living in a meditation centre in Dharamsala for 6 months or attending retreats around the world and I put mindfulness at the centre of my lifestyle. I believe that I tapped into resources inside which I hadn’t known I had,” she shares. “So yoga, meditation and inner harmony really can only be put into practise during a crisis.”
Reflecting back, the global actress also mentions how writing helped her through some of her low moments. “I started a blog, The Yellow Dairies, which helped me to digest what I was going through.” A chronicle of her personal journey, the Yellow Diaries provides an insight into Ray’s experience with cancer, from the steroid-induced hunger pangs to losing her hair to some of the life lessons she learnt from close friends. Ray’s blog is often raw, sometimes humorous, but always honest. In September 2009, she wrote, “It’s a taboo to speak openly about long term, potentially fatal diseases. Jeez. Why didn’t anyone tell me? I would have spoken earlier.” Addressing her battle with cancer candidly, Ray’s blog inspired thousands around the world. It also brought her a tremendous amount of support from India, Canada and the rest of the world, for which she is grateful for. “I was so touched by the heartfelt response I received from the subcontinent.”
Ever since her diagnosis, Ray has used her celebrity status to help raise awareness of this rare cancer, beginning with her brave decision to announce her illness to the public at the 2009 Toronto Film Festival. Since then, Ray has undertaken numerous cancer initiatives, including raising funds to establish the first research chair for multiple myeloma at the Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto and partnering with Myeloma Canada to spread the word about treatment options and access to care. Also a strong advocate of stem cell treatment, Ray believes stem cells are the next big thing in medicine. “I believe [stem cells] hold the key to curing many diseases. I’ve spent time in the labs seeing an actual human heart built in a petri dish – its game changing.”
Ray was declared cancer-free in April 2010 and has regular blood work and maintenance treatment done to ensure the disease remains dormant. Ray dislikes the phrase cancer survivor to call herself a cancer graduate, as she believes her ordeal has left her wiser. “Cancer is not the end of the road,” she blogged a month after remission. “It’s a cryptic restart.”
Moving Forward
In this new chapter of her life, Ray has found love and married the man she was meant to spend her life with. She said ‘I do’ at Napa Valley to Jason Dehni, a banking executive and they celebrate their second anniversary on October 20th. The happy couple met through a mutual friend, Seamus O’ Regan, the Canadian media personality, who after interviewing Ray for Canada AM, suggested she get involved with a charity called Artbound, which Dehni co-founded.
“It was a case of Carpe Diem,” Ray says of Dehni’s proposal. “Jason surprised me in Napa Valley after a retreat, planning his proposal around a sunset bike ride but as usual I upset all his carefully laid plans due to an eye infection. We ended up in our robes, drinking wine when I playfully asked him why he hadn’t yet proposed! So he had no choice but to drop his former plans and grab the moment. He got down on one knee in his robe. It was the most romantic moment of my life!”
Amidst her married bliss, Ray’s advocacy for cancer awareness remains a priority. She auctioned her wedding saree in order to raise funds for cancer research in India. Last year, she also added 'Designer' to her ever-expanding resume and launched a limited edition line of 10 sarees which were designed in collaboration with the renowned Indian design house, Satya Paul. These sarees all feature themes of hope and a portion of sales from the collection in Canada will go towards myeloma research at the Princess Margaret Cancer Centre in Toronto. “I [also] just completed my participation for the past 6 months on a clinical trial at Princess Margaret Hospital for an entirely new way to treat cancer,” says Ray. She was also the recipient of the prestigious Diamond Jubilee Medal for her contributions to Canada in 2013.
Post-remission, Ray has been working simultaneously on various projects and she quickly reels off a list. “I’m finishing a memoir for Harper Collins, looking at scripts in Mumbai, assessing film and theatre projects... I also just shot a hot new television commercial for Rado watches, with Hrithik.” Ray will also return this fall for the fifth season of the hit series, Top Chef Canada, a project she remains ecstatic about given her love for food. “I’ve had a passion for international cuisine and I’ve literally eaten my way across the world: from asado in Buenos Aires to ostrich in Cape Town,” Ray states. “Top Chef is a fantastic format which came along at the perfect point in my life.” She is also has plans to launch a new blog, called The Stream, to share her passion for food. More recently, Ray was named the first Global Brand Ambassador for Insight Vacations, a luxury boutique travel company, which offers luxury vacations throughout Europe, North America, India and Nepal. “[I] just spent a few weeks in India and Italy filming ‘Insight Moments’ with a fab team,” confirms Ray. “This is my Eat Pray Love year, as I’m heading to Bali in September.”
“I think Hans Christian Anderson expresses my life philosophy best in the Fairy Tale of my Life,” shares Ray, as the interview concludes. “To move, to breathe, to fly, to float, To gain all while you give, To roam the roads of lands remote, To travel is to live.”
Photo credit: Joy Datta and Lisa Ray
