I couldn’t help but smile as I stole a moment to watch them as they boarded the airplane.They looked so happy, excited about something only they shared. He held her hand as he guided her to their seats across the aisle to settle in for the flight. She looked happy, radiant, and tired at the same time yet her smile didn’t fade. He was so attentive to her – proud and protective of her comfort. I knew I was witnessing something special yet I wasn’t sure what, until I overheard their conversation with the flight attendant. They had just experienced going through one of the biggest days in their lives – THEIR WEDDING.
No wonder the new bride was heady with exhaustion. From the excitement of planning their dream wedding to trying to please everyone, she felt like she had just gotten off an emotional rollercoaster. Yet in the end, the wedding was perfect, even though it didn’t go perfectly to plan. I could relate. I’d been there many years ago.We can be so caught up in planning for every detail of a perfect wedding; however, sometimes the unexpected happens. We can’t control everything during this exciting and emotional time.
Therefore, for your perfect wedding – here are some tips to balance your emotions by recognizing your support, gaining a sense of control, and having a positive perspective. Trust that it will all work out.
Don’t ever forget that you have the support of many. Remember, your family and dear friends love you – they want you to be happy. Weddings are wonderful. The celebration of two people joining together to love and honour each other as they start a new life and family together is a joyous occasion. They are routing for you and always remember that, especially if emotions feel strained in the moment.
Here’s an example – I met my husband to be when we were in our mid-20’s and within two years our wedding was planned. Not only would the wedding symbolize a new life with him, I was soon going to be a part of a whole new family . . . his. Some of his family would make the trip for the wedding. We were also planning to spend many months visiting all his family on the other side of the world and for me, meeting them for the first time. I was especially nervous about my new mother-in-law. I could not escape the age-old adage – would she approve of me? Would I be good enough for her son?
That was over 20 years ago. From new bride to raising two sons who are now in their late teens, I now have a different perspective of how a mother-in-law might feel. It’s a time she dreams about, yet she may also feel a twinge of sadness as she lets go. It’s an emotional time for all so don’t worry or feel defensive. You’re planning the perfect wedding and your family and friends are there to support you as you prepare for the big day.
Ah yes the planning part – so much to organize. There’s the venue, decorations, traditions to follow, invitations, guest lists, gifts to purchase, the menu, place settings, photographs, catering, costs, transportation and finding the perfect dress, to name a few. Your attention to detail, as you masterfully pull this all together will empower you as you feel a sense of control in your ability to create the environment and experience of your dream wedding. Yet remember – the perfect wedding is an elusive quest. Meaning, don’t get caught up in the overwhelm of trying to control too many seemingly important details. You may not have a plan B for everything, so let go of those worries. The unexpected means something you wouldn’t expect so lighten up and let go of what you can’t control. It may rain at an inopportune time, the side of the outdoor tent may loose it’s grip and blow in the wind, the best man may lose his footing for a moment, yet trust that over 95% of your wedding will be just as you planned. When the spontaneity of the unexpected has its moment, it will create common ground – an authentic human experience to add to the memory, and that’s what makes it perfect.
It’s our emotions, our experiences, and our relationships with others that make our lives memorable and full of value. It’s your day, your wedding, and your family and loved ones will be there to celebrate and share in your joy. Cherish the emotions of every moment and your wedding will be perfect.
Photo Credit: Rocky Choi (RokChoi Photography)