The days are shorter, the weather colder and the holiday countdown begins. The malls are filled with beautiful decorations. Images of peace, love, and harmony are popping up everywhere. It’s a time for great joy, good feelings, and family togetherness … or is it?
In theory, the holiday season is filled with joy and celebration. It’s meant to be a wonderful time when you get together with friends, co-workers, and loved ones to catch up, exchange gifts, and generally have a good time.
Unfortunately, the reality is that the winter holidays can be a time of great stress and unhappiness. There is so much to do and so much to organize. Sometimes getting together with extended family members can be uncomfortable and even painful. Christmas is in fact, for many people, one of the most stressful events of the year. The expense of buying gifts, the pressure of last minute shopping, and the heightened expectations of family togetherness can all combine to undermine our best intentions.
If you have felt this too, you’re not alone. Each year, thousands of people suffer from increased stress, frustration, or depression during the winter. Some say there is an emotional time bomb built into the North American holiday season. It starts around Halloween and continues to about mid January. Much of this stress can be avoided, however. Whether you are celebrating Diwali, Xmas, or another festive holiday, take advantage of these helpful tips to lessen your holiday stress and have a truly enjoyable season.
Christmas Shopping
Every year, thousands of shoppers leave their shopping until the last minute on Xmas Eve. Vow that this year will be different. Get your Christmas shopping done early, so you don’t have to spend hours fighting other shoppers for the last doll or Christmas turkey. To avoid the long line-ups try shopping online or use mail order catalogues. Many of the online companies will also gift-wrap and mail your presents for a small additional fee.
Next year, get a head start on the game by planning to shop throughout the year for Xmas gifts especially when you see a great gift item on sale. In fact, why not plan for next year now by picking up bargains on Boxing Week sales and saving them for next Xmas.
Make a list of all the gifts you wish to buy before you go shopping. If you wait for inspiration to strike, you could be wandering aimlessly around the shopping centre for hours. Buy a few extra little presents such as chocolates, in case you forget someone or have unexpected guests.
Presents
For many of us, the Christmas aftermath includes massive credit card bills that can take months to clear. Christmas doesn’t have to be a financial headache if you plan ahead. Budget for Christmas and gift giving so that you don’t overspend.
Give yourself a limit for each person and stick to it. Shopping early will help you stick to your budget as you will not be in a last minute panic, picking up anything that may be suitable regardless of the cost. Long after those expensive gifts have been opened, what you gave may be forgotten, but what you paid will keep coming back month after month in credit card bills. Remember that homemade or thoughtful, inexpensive gifts from the heart are often cherished far more than high-priced items.
Buying Presents For Many People
If you have a large circle of extended family or friends to buy gifts for, buying presents for everyone can be very costly. So try suggesting a change in the way your family and friends give presents. For example, you could recommend that your family: buy presents only for the children, have each person draw a name out of a hat and buy a present only for that person, or set a limit on the cost of presents. Wrap the presents as soon as you can after buying them—this will leave one less thing to do on Christmas eve.
Prioritize, and Keep the Rest Simple
There are not enough hours in the day—unless, maybe, if you’re Martha Stewart—to do everything to perfection. So make a list of everything that needs to get accomplished, and choose three things that mean the most to you; for example, spending time with family, baking homemade cookies, or sending beautiful holiday cards with handwritten personalized messages inside. For everything else: simplify, simplify, simplify.
Let’s say you want to simplify gift giving: Consider buying different versions of the same item. For example, you could buy a different book for each person on your gift list. Choose each person’s book with his or her individual preferences and interests in mind. The online giants Amazon and Chapters provide a huge selection of books. From the comfort of your home, you could do your entire gift buying in an hour. To reduce your gift wrapping time, consider using holiday gift bags instead of wrapping each present. Many online companies will even wrap the present for you for a small fee.
Christmas and Holiday Cooking
Again planning is very important. Realize that you don’t have to do it all yourself. Consider a simpler version of Christmas dinner this year, such as a buffet where each friend or family member brings a dish. This way the work is shared amongst everyone and each person can feel like they have contributed. See what preparations can be made a few days before hand. Some treats like pudding, tarts, and sweets can be made weeks ahead.
Buy as many non-perishable food items as you can in advance. Keep in mind that supermarkets on Christmas Eve are generally extremely busy. You may need to order particular food items (such as turkeys) from your supermarket by a certain date so check with the store to avoid disappointment. Also, consider doing your food shopping online. For a small fee, many grocery stores will deliver your groceries to your door. If you plan to have your dinner celebrations at a restaurant, call ahead. Some restaurants may be fully booked for months before Christmas, so don’t wait until the last minute.
Relationships: Dealing with the Unpleasant Relatives
A family naturally expects to have a good time on holidays. However, it is worth remembering that most families only spend a few hours per day together because of work, school and recreational pursuits. Habits that are usually just annoying could become major sources of irritation when you spend every waking minute together on holidays.
During this festive season we can also be thrown together with people that we would really rather not have anything to do with. Do your best to be pleasant to them but if they cross the line and say something that is rude—stay calm. Do not attack back; let them know that you do not appreciate their comments and that you would rather hear positive remarks about yourself and other members of your family.
Don’t expect miracles. If certain family members bicker all year long, this is not likely to stop just because it’s Xmas.
Avoid known triggers. For example, if politics is a touchy subject—avoid it. If someone brings up the topic, use distraction and quickly move onto something else to talk about. Do your best not to let the comments of one person spoil your day. Try not to dwell on negativity. Instead think about the things you are enjoying and find someone you do get along well and talk to them. Use relaxation techniques, such as focusing on your breath or deep breathing to cope with anxiety or tension that may arise.
Family members involved in after-dinner activities are less likely to get into arguments then if you stay sitting around the table. So plan for something to do as a group after dinner if necessary. Remember that alcohol can increase your emotional reactions to any situation so drink in moderation or avoid it all together. People under stress tend to ‘self-medicate’ with alcohol, cigarettes or other drugs. If you have a family member or co-worker who tends to be a heavy drinker, plan your meal to be alcohol free. For example, you could serve a holiday punch or delicious non-alcoholic drinks instead of regular wine and liquor.
Take care of yourself
Make sure that you look after yourself with appropriate exercise, relaxation, sleep and a healthy diet during the holiday months. When we are feeling fit and energetic we are able to cope so much more easily with the ups and downs of life. However if we are already feeling tired and stressed any little thing can overwhelm us and this can make social gatherings more difficult.
Your body and mind function best with adequate sleep, nourishment and exercise. This is your first line of defense against the added stress and demands of the holiday season. So don’t be tempted to get by on less-than-needed sleep; instead, look for ways to simplify holiday preparations. Try not to overindulge in too many fatty or sweet-laden foods that abound this time of year. These types of food zap your energy levels, and can send your mood on a roller-coaster ride of unwanted highs and lows. Avoid going out to a party hungry, instead have a snack before you go to curb your appetite.
If you must cut back on your normal exercise time, try to keep fit by incorporating some extra movement in your daily errands. For example, you could park further away from store entrances, or take stairs instead of escalators or elevators.
The expense of gifts and food, the pressure of shopping, and the expectations of the season, can all make the winter holidays an extremely stressful time. But by planning ahead and taking care of yourself this year you can create the holiday you’ve dreamed of. Relax, celebrate, and have fun! Happy holidays.